My trip was amazing- it really was. I spent 2 1/2 weeks with a friend, who I love dearly. We did lot of travelling- including one night in Manhattan where we met up with a gang of other people we know (we all met on the same website) and a weekend at a convention in New Jersey!
I learned a lot about myself- some of it was extremely painful to hear and accept. But now I know, I can do something about it. Also I have finally accepted that I have changed a lot in the last few years- stuff that I used to do I don't- that is a good thing. But I still have a lot to work on but I feel like it's not impossible- and I have the love and support off certain people so I can do it- and be a better person.Anyway- eating wise- very mixed. We did NO cooking what so ever! Every day we ate out. The only thing we ate at home were lox (American for smoked salmon) and cream cheese bagels and leftovers from what we brought back from meals out. Most of my dinners were things like burgers, pizza, sandwiches, pancakes....all bad! Except we did go for sushi twice- which is a much more Slimming World friendly option- albeit mega expensive!!
However- I didn't binge eat once! Most of the time I ate 3 meals and no snacking. So even though the food was naughty my attitude around food was much better! It is progress for me and that makes me happy!
Also- I weighed myself on the Wii fit and it is telling me I have *only* gained 10lb! Some people would die with that but I am really content. No body magic, eating very high calorie foods- as well as just getting off a plane and star week...I will take that! I put on over double that when I went for Canada for the same length of time (25lb to be exact) I also have til Tuesday to get back on plan and make the damage even less! So feeling positive!
I had my last 2 doughnuts when I was at JFK airport. As soon as I was on the plane I stuck to plan- had my low fat meal and turned down the pretzels and fresh orange juice- opting for water and black coffee. At Dublin airport I had a diet coke then as soon as I got home I had bacon and egg sandwich- Slimming World style! I made curry muffins (curry loaf but in muffin cases) and had them with salad.
Today- I woke up late since my body clock is still 5 hours behind. I had 2 activa 0% yoghurts to tide me over til my meal. I went out for an appointment- popped into Asda (where I worked for half an hour off the clock- aren't I nice? lol) and then got home, had a bowl of salad, extra light mayo (1/2 syn) and 3 curry muffins. Pudding was sugar free jelly (1 syn)
I went to farmageddon with my Mum, a friend of ours (who has nearly lost 5 stone with SW- amazing woman!) and her son (another young relative of some kind). For those of you who don't know what Farmageddon is- it's a halloween attraction in a farm just outside of Liverpool- 3 haunted houses with scary zombies (all real people) and it's hilarious- I definitely recommend!
I got home and warmed myself up with porridge (with a dash of milk from my HEA but made with water and sweetener) and a bag of my favourite frozen fruit
I am a little hungry so will grab the last of those curry muffins to have with a cup of tea before bed.
To be honest- being back on plan and focusing on my food- it's given me something positive to focus on. I have been getting rather depressed and not wanting to do anything- I miss my friend in NY, I miss being there and having laughs with her. I realised last night how far she is- it's not like I can just get on a train or a bus- it takes months of organising- taking time off work- and costing a lot of money.
But absence makes the heart grow fonder, and all that. I am so happy that she actually wants to have me back-as soon as next year! It surprises me more than anything because she knows all the bad stuff that I've done, the icky things I've never shared about with anyone- yet she still wants to know me! I am so glad of that too.So after new year I am going to work out how long I can stay for and book my holidays from work in advance so I can go- then budget. So that extra £5 a week I will save being a target member will definitely come in handy!!
I have a lot to look forward to in the next year- my mum's wedding being one of them- so not wishing my life away- just keeping busy and looking forward to the life I have always wanted!
Now- I am going to finish my chores off, chill out and get ready for bed!
Good to be back- I've missed you all!
Much Love,
Tanya x
