Flutterby is in Canada!

Hi guys! Today is a lazy day so thought I would post one of these babies up- I know you've missed me!

So I set off on my trip to Canada on Wednesday- everything went swimmingly- no delays and we even got an earlier bus from Montreal to Ottawa so we didn't have to wait an extra 2 hours- just what was needed after being up for nearly 24 hours!

For people who don't know- I'm staying with my friend Marg, someone I've known for about 4 years. She's been my rock on many occasions. When I was at my worst she always had time for an msn chat or 2.

I was here 3 years ago- when I was at my biggest and probably at one of my lowest ebbs. Even though I had a good time I came back disappointed because there was so much I couldn't do- either because of my size (couldn't go for walks) or because of my mental state (hated going out in crowds, it brought on panic attacks). 

What upset me the most was the lack of photographs. There were a few- in fact nearly all of my "before" pictures were taken while I was there. But I came back with less than 70 pictures and about 5 of them were of me.

I'm sure a lot of people can identify with the fact that when I was big- I tried to avoid the camera. I was a bit of a fat ninja- as soon as one came out I was ducking and diving trying to avoid them. It was hard to hide behind people when I was over 23 stone!!!

I actually had a couple of pictures taken with Marg, which show a bit of a change. Only in me though- in 3 years she hasn't even changed! heehee.

Anyway- so much has changed in the last 3 years. Not just because of the weight loss- but the confidence, happiness and willingness to just do stuff too! I've been here 5 days and already I've taken more pictures than in the 3 weeks last time and there are a few pictures of me! Awesome!

We have had a couple of trips out too.

Marg, her daughter Rebecca and I went on a walk around Calabogie on friday (that's where we are right now) I had to post  couple of things so it was a pleasant 2k walk each way, with some picture taking on the way! 

On Saturday we went into Ottawa to a craft fair. My friend, Benita had a stall there- selling jewellery and pendants. She specialises in healing stones. (Actually check out her Facebook page some of the pieces are amazing!) Then we went on a shopping trip to Costco- or as I have no named it- sample city!! So many samples- I barely needed food.....even though I bought a slice of pizza while I was there- massive piece and mega tasty!

I've not really been on plan much but we are eating well. I'm having most of my veggies without butter, just boiled and the meat is de-fatted after cooking so there are things like that. I've even cut up pineapples and berries to snack on! Of course- we have tasty fat-free yoghurt in the fridge (it's activia which is pretty much a safe bet) I am eating rubbish, like having doughnuts in Tim Hortons with an Iced Capp but hey- I'm in Canada you kinda HAVE to do these things here!

But I have made decent choices- which is habit for me now- I have been doing this for 2 years so anything you do for this length of time really is a habit!

Anyway so I am making the most of my new lease of life by making the most of my valuable time with Marg and the rest of my Canadian family!

So it's my birthday on Saturday. I was saying to Marg and Becca yesterday- 25 is actually a milestone for me. I remember having a chat with a friend just before joining Slimming World, after the bullying in university and realising that my physical health was declining. I said that I was that desperate to do something, because I knew that if I didn't, I wouldn't make it to 25. If it wasn't due to nature, I probably would have tried to end my own life. I was at a point even then, in 2011 that I didn't want to live. I was miserable, felt like a failure and I couldn't do anything that I wanted to do....

But hey- look at me now! That is definitely not the case. I might not have a degree, a big house, great career and loads of money in the bank. But I have a job, some money saved the love and respect of my friends and family and I have actually turned my life around. 

There are 5 days until my birthday so hey- might not even make it to 25 after all but I have a pretty decent chance eh? People who have read this blog for a while know that I reflect on the last few years every so often and I have been doing that. I just love my life right now. The day before I went to Canada I spent the evening with my Mum, Niall and Jamie, my Nana and some of my best friends. It was an early birthday meal (Curry night- what else??) I had a great evening and I was so happy that people wanted to spend time with me. It wasn't always like that so sometimes I can be a it soppy thinking about it. 

So I'm such a happy flutterby right now. It didn't happen overnight, it took a lot of hard work- physically and mentally. But all I did was put one foot in front of the other, stayed honest with my feelings, kept in touch with people in my support network and I didn't give up!!! 

So anyone reading that's struggling- don't you dare give up! Tough times do not last forever. Just dust yourself and get back up. You are worth the effort- please don't forget that!

Anyway- time for dinner and to get back to being a social Flutterby!

Thanks for being on my journey with me!

Much Love,
Tanya x

https://www.facebook.com/FatFlutterby

Great Day!

Hi blogees! Just a quick one from me.

I got weighed at 1pm today- was greeted with a half pound gain. I'm happy- considering how out of control I was for 3 whole days. I started my day positively and I am sticking with the plan of action that I pledged yesterday!

I went to the 5pm group, after shopping and nattering with a friend. Then I went to visit dad for a bit.

My extra body magic was in the form of walking home from dad's but taking a detour- so instead of 15 minutes it was 40 minutes. I felt better for it- even though my ankle is giving me a bit of annoyance.

My food for today:

Breakfast- WW yog
Lunch- turkey breast and ham salad box (double meat) and sweet onion dressing (2 syns) and 2 cherry bakewell hifi bars (HEB+ 6 syns)
Dinner- Chicken and Black Bean sauce (8 syns worth) with boiled rice.
Snacks- tin baked beans, WW yog, caramelised ginger sample (teeny bit- 1/2syn)

So a little over my syns- 16 1/2. But in control, which is the main thing!

Tomorrow is "Red Hot" day! But going to have a decent breakfast and dinner so just going to be lunch that's going to be uber syns- but that's ok- that's 1 meal- as long as I don't sabotage I'll be really happy!

Ok- here's to a great week- hopefully!

Much Love,
Tanya x

facebook.com/fatflutterby <----join me on facebook!

Another Line, Another Go

Hi everyone, about time I got posting!

I have been up and down, up and down and so on lately. I'd have a good day, or 2, or 3....then *boom* self sabotage appears and I just go "sod it" and eat about 5 times the amount that I should be eating.

This has been a common theme lately and it was only yesterday did it start to dawn on me that this really is serious and it's something I need to look at more. If I don't then the 20+ stone mark will be back before I know it.

My pants are teeeeeeerribly tight- both my jeans and work pants....my tummy looks like one off one of those little buddahs and I am feeling lethargic and just generally grumpy.

It is so damn easy to fall into that rut of eating and eating- for the sake of it most of the time- because it's there. It takes a lot of effort, will power in some cases and determination to get out of said rut and get back on plan....

Today- ok not perfect on plan but it is better! I ate some fruit....I had an original day so lots of meat and things. I did have a teeny piece of birthday cake in my break today but I did stop at that! I nommed my fruit and tomatoes and didn't have any more uber syns!

It's progress!

Tomorrow- it's going to be ugly. I'm getting weighed earlier, which believe it or not is worse for me. I am working so I'll have been up since 4.30 and I'll have just eaten, as well as having to keep hydrated more, lots of water!

But I need to get weighed. So I'm going to- and that's ok.

This week is going to be hard- I'm laying it out there now. I have a meal out tomorrow night (Indian- must stay away from the naan bread!!) and to an all-you-can-eat buffet on Wednesday. But there is no reason why I shouldn't lose next week anyway. That's 2 meals! One of which I can make decent choices. 

After tomorrow there are TWO weigh ins until my trip to Canada! (16 days to go- omg!!) and I want to be less than I am now- that's for sure! I want my clothes to fit. I want my energy back so I can enjoy myself! Any most importantly- my confidence has taken a dip lately and I want that confidence back!!!! It's amazing how something so subtle can knock the confidence you've spent ages trying to build up. 

So- this is serious.....it really is. No, no I know I've said it before. I have done this before- I haven't messed up or failed- just a minor blip..... watch this space!!!

This is currently more-flabby-than-I-want-to-be Flutterby's plan of action over the next 7 days:

1) Food Diary- no matter what, write it down. I am saying now the ONLY exception is what is going to be nommed at Red Hot. What happens at Red Hot- stays at Red Hot! But everything else- if I nibble, I scribble

2) Body Magic- it's kinda limited at the moment due to hurting my neck AGAIN! But it doesn't stop me from walking. I am not counting the walk to work and back as body magic. I am going to do half an hour every day of EXTRA exercise/activity. Mostly walking- my neck can't take much more than that.

3) I am going to live in the day- simples, not worry about the whole week ahead but just get up- plan my day and follow it through! 

4) Going to be kind to myself- that'll be harder. But it's something we ALL need to do. People are all too willing to judge us and be nasty to us- we have to stick up for ourselves and be kind to us! Even if it's just smiling in the mirror- thinking something positive about myself and realising that I am worth the effort!

Only 4 points- keeping it simple this week!

Brand new week starts right....

___________________________________________

 now!!!!

The line is drawn and there is nothing I can do about the last few weeks- so I am not going to dwell on it. What's the point? Exactly- there isn't one!

Feeling positive now that I've got this out- fantastic!

So we shall see what this week brings eh? But the countdown to Canada is well and truly on!

Great to be back!

Much Love,
Tanya x

Join me on facebook!  https://www.facebook.com/FatFlutterby xx

25 Random Facts about Flutterby

I interrupt your normal viewing with a random bit of trivial fun!

A friend of a friend has this blog, right (checky here for it- the chick makes some sense! And is doing really well on her weight loss journey too) and her latest post was 25 facts about herself.

This mutual friend insists that because I've read it I have to keep it going- so......why not- want to know about this Flutterby? Let's see.....

1)  I have a younger brother, who is awesome, 2 step-sisters, 3 step brothers and a Jamie (everyone needs a Jamie- but he is ours only- sorry!)

2) I'm left handed- very heavily left handed- there really isn't much I can do with my right hand- apart from use a computer mouse.

3) I'm a Maths geek- love numbers- I often used to cure boredom by working through Maths text books

4) I always wanted to be a teacher (actually- I didn't *always*- I wanted to be a prison officer when I was a kid- then wanted to be a teacher) Then realised that I actually hate kids (most of them anyway!) and now I want to be a Slimming World consultant (for obvious reasons!)

5) I have a thing for butterflies (can you tell?) I don't know why and I don't know what started it off- but I love them!

6) I was pretty much always a tomboy when I was a kid- now I'm a proper girly- girl. I love dresses, shoes and shiny things (but still can't be bothered with make up)

7) I have my ears pierced- I was 2 when I had them done- apparently I had my first ear done and before I could start crying my mum stuck a Double Lolly in my gob....it did the job!

8) I have one tattoo- on my arm- the word "Recovery"- which symbolises my recovery from addiction, self harm (in many forms) and self destruction. I said I'd only get a tattoo once I lost weight. Now I would like more because they're awesome!

9) I love my cat (no euphemism there you dirty, dirty people)

10) I thrive on sunshine- I do suffer with SAD in the winter- so when the sun is out- I make the most of it!

11) I only have 3 people who I trust with anything- one of which I've only known 11 months.

12) I bite my nails

13) I love dancing- I'm not very coordinated but I love bopping around the room to some music. I can't dance on my own in a public place though because it's embarrassing and I have my pride!

14) I'm a terrible people pleaser and a worrier- I've stayed up many-a-night worrying about things. I know people do but I'm a bit of an extreme

15) I love hugs, lots and lots of hugs.

16) I have a teddy, Cuggles, who I sleep with every night. I can never sleep well if I don't have my teddy. I might be 24 but still- not ashamed of it! (Cuggles was given to me by my friend Marg, a christmas present that arrived a month late, but was totally worth it)

17) My music playlist is very random- ranging from Muse to Florence and the Machine, even a bit of dancy music there. I love music and I have some to suit every mood and outfit!

18) I used to collect thimbles- until I realised they collected way too much dust. I still have them- but not on show. I have literally millions.

19) I have a tendency to exaggerate a touch sometimes- and I'm a little teeny bit sarcastic, like, all of the time.

20) I really hate cooked cauliflower and ripe bananas- because they stink and are icky- but raw or green (and I don't mean green cauli!) it's fine.

21) I was in a photographic society in University and I had some photos in a real exhibition.

22) I love my job! I might not like some parts of it but the job itself is great and I have one or 2 little mates there which makes me happy.

23) I lived on my own for 3 years before moving in with my Dad. Then moved in with my Mum- because she's awesome and cooks really nice food :)

24) I mimic accents all the time- not realising I am doing it- which doesn't help when you are going to Canada in a few weeks- for nearly a month! I will definitely come back with a twang.

25) I can touch my nose with my tongue. Apparently the first time I pulled tongues as a baby I freaked my Mum out a little bit.

Ok so that's me.....a little bit more of me....I'm weird, I know

And if you've read this- you have to do it too! Either in a blog- or on Facebook on a note. Come on- join in- I'm a nosey mare and want to read more of these!!!

Normal service will resume in the next blog!

Much Love,
Tanya x

New Changes, Getting a Grip and Plugging Away

Hi everyone- apologies for being so quiet lately- life has been really hectic and I've not had much time online.

Last week was a bit of a disaster eating wise. I booked a "holiday" at group because I knew it was going to be a disaster and I was away at the weekend....so a gain was imminent.

So because I told myself I wasn't getting weighed for 2 weeks I had a "black hole" Tuesday. Ate what I wanted....

Then I went to work on Wednesday and a colleague brought me a piece of home made mega-syns cheesecake- which was gorgeous! So I thought "oh well- blown it today- might as well enjoy myself and get back on it Thursday"- something I NEVER did before I got to target and still losing!

Thursday....well, I just didn't have the focus in me so I just kept eating- and eating and eating........

Then it was Blackpool! Well- anyone who has been to Blackpool will know that there aren't many eateries where there are low-syn meals! A group of us went to a lovely restaurant which specialised in fish and chips.....and cake- lots of cake!!

The hotel I was staying at had brekkie included in the price- the only thing syn free were the tinned tomatoes- even the bacon you couldn't get the fat off because of how streaky it was! So I enjoyed myself! Over did it- definitely but I enjoyed myself.

I did buy a couple of punnets of strawberries and took rocky roads with me so it could have been worse! (That's what I'm telling myself!)

Anyway I got back and I still couldn't draw a line under it! I could not stop eating no matter how much I told myself to stop!

So I knew the inevitable- I was going to get weighed on Tuesday. I found a fiver and I got myself to group. Don't get me wrong I was going to go anyway- but I wasn't going to get weighed. I was just going to see the lovely members and have a natter but I knew that the accountability was necessary to start again.

I put 6lb on.....

Which, all things considered, that was a pretty decent result!

I had a good natter with Julie last week in regards to going back to my old target. It seems that, even though I wanted to lose more, I'm not half bad where I was with my 10st 1lb weight loss. My BMI was healthy (still is) and I was doing ok at maintaining.

So I asked Julie if it was possible to go back to my old target- she found out for me and it is possible- but I have to get to my exact target weight (12st 6) not just in the target range....

The 6lb gain takes me to 12 8.5lb so I have 2.5lb to lose to get to target. That way I can stop stressing, stop getting angry and frustrated with myself and just take it easy. I really have been stressing too much.

I'm going to Canada in 4 weeks (This time in 4 weeks I should be in the air!) and I want to get back into the art of maintaining for a little while before I go.

So that's the plan. I would love to lose the 2.5lb this week so we shall see where I am on Tuesday!

I've well and truly got a grip. I got a lot of motivation off Julie and the members of the groups I was at. That's why I go to group- to keep grounded and to get the support I need! And to support others if I can.

Oh- there is an "Ops" evening (when you get information about being a Slimming World consultant) on 12th April. Julie said if she doesn't have a team meeting or anything else on she'll take me which is awesome! I think it will be great to get all the info I need. I have been before but we got there late (I went with another member) so it will be good to go so I can have a read over and put plans in place so I am stable enough financially to apply! It's so exciting!

Anyway I am off to bed- I've been on plan today- 7 syns in total- when life is a bit less hectic I will get back to the food diaries etc on here- promise.

My alarm is going off at 2.30am as my shift starts at 4am! Need my sleep!

Ni night you lot!

Much Love,

Tanya x

https://www.facebook.com/FatFlutterby

Oh Here We Go Again!

This just feels like a repeat of a few weeks ago- only I'm not at Caz's computer weeping my heart out feeling like the whole world has kicked me in my non-existent nads!

I was doing so well this week- apart from "Sod It Tuesday". I had planned meals- had low syns, ate less fruit and more veggies, changed my Healthy Extras around....

Then came today....

Usually I am one of those people that sees the weekend as a normal day- nothing special. I work in retail- we don't really *do* weekends. But I have been off all week- I've been pretty inactive (because I've been resting my bad knee which is still mad sore!) and just all-round been a lazy flutterby.

Anyway- today was my step-sister's 18th birthday. With birthdays come cake- 2 cakes in fact (now 3- I notice there is a giant cupcake on the table here) Initially I was being really good and turning down a piece....then I had a bit of icing.....

Then I had a piece- ok 2 (teeny pieces) then I had a taste of the homemade chocolate cake.....ok a small piece....which started me off......I then had an easter egg and one of those caramel eggs....

Then I went to a meeting and had half a dozen jammy dodger thingies and some cookies.....

Then I went to my mate's house and had quavers and custard (don't ask!) and houmous with carrot sticks and cucumber (see? some healthy stuff!) then followed by a packet (a whole one) of jaffa cakes....

Then I went home and had some rice krispies.....and a cheese buttie....and some toast....with butter....and then a big bowl of rice krispies WITH sugar!

WHEN IS THIS GOING TO STOP!!!!

I don't want to know about the syns- I really don't....it's SCARY!!

Over the space of the evening I was getting guilt, then "sod it, don't care", then guilt, then "it's ok, I'll accept the result on Tuesday", then "I'm not getting weighed"....

I have been arguing with myself (in my head- I'm not THAT crazy!!) trying to get myself to stop- of course, I couldn't.

I have 1 week left of my countdown and I really wanted to be at target then and it looks like I'm going to be about half a stone heavier than when I started it 6 weeks ago! It's sickening. 

There is something just not quite right in my head now- the want has gone. It's like I'm starting to accept my size- great, fantastic....but I still want to sabotage everything! Look, I know that I've lost 10 stone, just over- woohoo- bully for me. For some people I know that's mega inspirational, I get that- I sought inspiration like that- people who had lost lots.

What I didn't realise is this stuff doesn't get easier! Sorry guys- I don't want you to think that once you lose the weight it will be all hunky dory and you will never need to worry about it ever again (I'm not insinuating that you think like that- but that's what I thought, genuinely!)

The hard work is in the maintaining- because you don't have anything to aim for- no awards, no stickers, no attention.....just a "well done, you're still at target, how are you for this week ahead?" in Image Therapy....

Anyway- I think I've had my fill.....I just wish I didn't have to go through this every couple of months. I just want to be able to eat like a "normal person". (Which isn't dissimilar when I hear alcoholics say that when they first got help with their drinking they wanted to be able to drink like normal people)

In fact I've just answered my own dilemma there. An alcoholic can't, and never will be able to, drink like a "normal person". I'm a food addict- therefore I very much doubt that I can eat, and think about food in the same way as a normal person....whoever this normal person is!!

Acceptance. My life tends to revolve around it- or it should do. We all have to accept a lot of things.

I accept that I'm 5'11, that I'm going to be called "Tan" by people who like to see me twitch. I accept that my brother is always going to jump out of dark spaces and scare me at every opportunity. I accept that I really am not the kind of person that suits wearing glasses......

But there are things that I struggle to accept- powerlessness over food being one. Other peoples' actions and thoughts being another. 

In fact those 2 things, if I could sort those things out and learn to accept them then I don't think I'd be half as miserable!

I cannot eat normally. When I'm eating- I'm wondering "is this enough?" and when I'm not eating- I'm constantly thinking about it. What can I snack on? What's for dinner? I know from experience that it's an obsession and an addiction- there's nothing much I can do about it, other than work on it! Do what people suggest.....some days I am good at it, I do these things that are suggested and I have a good, slightly less obsessive day.

Then there are days like today. Where I just stick anything in my mouth (don't be rude!) and feel the remorse later.

The other thing I struggle to accept- people. That's a big one with me at the moment because my head can be sent off big time with this.

I am one of those people that doesn't think so much of the people who care and who are positive- but focuses on the people who don't like me, who go out of their way to make little digs, or deliberately ignore me.....

Why? Because I hate being disliked!

Don't get me wrong- I am a marmite kinda girl- love me or hate me. I am gobby, sarcastic, I put my foot in it, I can be bitchy.....But I'm really sensitive. I am caring and I hate being disliked- and I hate disliking others....I have something called "stinking thinking" where I do take one little resentment and run with it- nurture it, feed it until it's a big fat resentment! I have done it a few times and there are still one or 2 that really get to me.

It is affecting my weight loss sometimes. Not so much the weight loss but going to group or posting in certain facebook groups. I have had little digs made at me, or had some posts blatantly ignored. Sometimes I'm asking for help and I don't get it....

I lie- I do get it- but not off the people I know have an issue with me. So the people that do comment, even though I am grateful- that goes on the backburner while I focus on thinking about why someone else hasn't commented or offered support....

There you go! Stinking thinking!

I know I need to focus on the light and the positives. I know people care and love me- those are the people I should spend my energy and time on... Sounds easy doesn't it? 

Maybe that's a mid-week resolution for me then- something to work on!

Anyway- I've had my fill of crappy food, back on plan from now. There is no way I'll get a loss but at least I can work on getting some of this extra food weight off!

I just needed to get this off my chest. I've always been told that there is no point bottling things up- that's how things get worse. Just share the crap and move on. 

I've shared the crap- now I'm moving on!

New day tomorrow- and there are going to be some positive changes made!

If you're struggling too- reach out- don't bottle it all up- don't isolate (I don't just mean with food here- with anything that is affecting your positivity) find someone you can trust- get it out. Then give yourself a way to turn the negative into a positive and go for it! Just because we feel bad now doesn't mean we will forever!

Thanks for sticking with me- I'm not perfect but I try my best- and god loves a trier (apparently!)

Much Love,
Tanya x

Don't forget to like my Fat Flutterby facebook page!

Picky Things and Re-reading My Book!

Hi you lot, me again!

I've had a case of the hungry monster today.....mainly because I couldn't really go out due to my sore knee (still!!) So I decided- rather than snack on fruit all day- I wanted a change.

I decided to make a syn free houmous to nom with carrot sticks, peppers and cucumber. It was really quick and easy- no piccy but here's the recipe:

**Syn Free Houmous**

Tin of chickpeas in water
splash of lemon juice
garlic
paprika
cajun spices
frylight

1) Blend the chickpeas with a bit of the water from the can with a hand blender until smooth
2) mix in the lemon juice, garlic, paprika and spices to taste. If you want to put more in then feel free to! I made mine with quite a bit of garlic.
3) leave to cool in the fridge for a bit- it tastes nicer cold

That's it- takes 2 minutes and is very tasty! Great if you are hosting a party and need nibbly bits.

Funnily enough I spent the evening with my friend Sami who is also doing Slimming World (newish member). We went to Asda for some nibbles and she bought a reduced fat sour cream and onion dip. It's about 1 syn a level tablespoon and I looked at the ingredients and thought "I can do better" so I'm going to make it my mission to make a low syn dip!

I taught her about a low syn chocolate dip though- for fruit dippy things- she couldn't believe it when she tried it- I guess the recipe is going to have to be written out too eh?

**Chocolate mousse/yoghurty pud**

1 tub fat free fromage frais
2 sachets of cadbury fudge highlights (2 syns a sachet- 4 syns for both)
a couple tablespoons sweetener

Just mix them altogether and serve with yummy fruit! Which we did. It was really yummy and felt like one of these "naughty treats". We split it between 3 of us so rounded it to 1 1/2 syns per portion that we had!

It was nice to have some munchies while with friends and not go over my syn allowance- there's no need to feel deprived!!

Anyway- what I also did today was I decided to try a different Healthy B option. Just for a laugh. Rather than just bread or rocky roads. So I got my book out (if you haven't for a while I recommend you do it too) and looked at the HUGE list of Healthy Extra options- it's not all bread and cereal you know!

Did you know that if on Extra Easy you can have some dried/canned/cooked fruit as a HEB? or some soups? Get your pack out and have a little read- a change may just do you good!

So my HEB today? Rhubarb! Frozen chunks cooked in a teeeeeeeeny bit of water and a few tablespoons of sweetener. 450g is a HEB and it was gorgeous! Will definitely be having it again! Even if I just have it as syns- at 1/2 syn per 100g cooked- it's not exactly breaking the bank!!

My food diary for today!

Breakfast- 2 skinny lizzies (2 syns), 2 bacon, 2 eggs, just over 1/2 tin beans, cherry tomatoes. Greek style muller for afters (1/2)
Lunch- houmous, 1 oatbran (1 syn) carrot sticks, sliced pepper and tomatoes (light lunch as was having dinner earlier)
Dinner- 4x Quorn sticky fillets, packet of low fat Supernoodles, lettuce, tomatoes, pepper, beetroot and pickles. 250g cooked rhubarb with weight watchers dessert yog
Snacks- houmous and cucumber, chocolate yoghurty pud with pineapple, grapes, apple and some banana (1 1/2 syns for the pud), weight watchers dessert yog.

Syns- 5
HEA- milk (300ml 1% milk)
HEB- 450g cooked rhubarb

Feeling positive this week- not letting the result of last week get me down!

Tomorrow is a busy day- going out in the evening with friends- so need to get my beauty sleep!

Ni night you lot
Much Love,
Tanya x

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