25 Random Facts about Flutterby

I interrupt your normal viewing with a random bit of trivial fun!

A friend of a friend has this blog, right (checky here for it- the chick makes some sense! And is doing really well on her weight loss journey too) and her latest post was 25 facts about herself.

This mutual friend insists that because I've read it I have to keep it going- so......why not- want to know about this Flutterby? Let's see.....

1)  I have a younger brother, who is awesome, 2 step-sisters, 3 step brothers and a Jamie (everyone needs a Jamie- but he is ours only- sorry!)

2) I'm left handed- very heavily left handed- there really isn't much I can do with my right hand- apart from use a computer mouse.

3) I'm a Maths geek- love numbers- I often used to cure boredom by working through Maths text books

4) I always wanted to be a teacher (actually- I didn't *always*- I wanted to be a prison officer when I was a kid- then wanted to be a teacher) Then realised that I actually hate kids (most of them anyway!) and now I want to be a Slimming World consultant (for obvious reasons!)

5) I have a thing for butterflies (can you tell?) I don't know why and I don't know what started it off- but I love them!

6) I was pretty much always a tomboy when I was a kid- now I'm a proper girly- girl. I love dresses, shoes and shiny things (but still can't be bothered with make up)

7) I have my ears pierced- I was 2 when I had them done- apparently I had my first ear done and before I could start crying my mum stuck a Double Lolly in my gob....it did the job!

8) I have one tattoo- on my arm- the word "Recovery"- which symbolises my recovery from addiction, self harm (in many forms) and self destruction. I said I'd only get a tattoo once I lost weight. Now I would like more because they're awesome!

9) I love my cat (no euphemism there you dirty, dirty people)

10) I thrive on sunshine- I do suffer with SAD in the winter- so when the sun is out- I make the most of it!

11) I only have 3 people who I trust with anything- one of which I've only known 11 months.

12) I bite my nails

13) I love dancing- I'm not very coordinated but I love bopping around the room to some music. I can't dance on my own in a public place though because it's embarrassing and I have my pride!

14) I'm a terrible people pleaser and a worrier- I've stayed up many-a-night worrying about things. I know people do but I'm a bit of an extreme

15) I love hugs, lots and lots of hugs.

16) I have a teddy, Cuggles, who I sleep with every night. I can never sleep well if I don't have my teddy. I might be 24 but still- not ashamed of it! (Cuggles was given to me by my friend Marg, a christmas present that arrived a month late, but was totally worth it)

17) My music playlist is very random- ranging from Muse to Florence and the Machine, even a bit of dancy music there. I love music and I have some to suit every mood and outfit!

18) I used to collect thimbles- until I realised they collected way too much dust. I still have them- but not on show. I have literally millions.

19) I have a tendency to exaggerate a touch sometimes- and I'm a little teeny bit sarcastic, like, all of the time.

20) I really hate cooked cauliflower and ripe bananas- because they stink and are icky- but raw or green (and I don't mean green cauli!) it's fine.

21) I was in a photographic society in University and I had some photos in a real exhibition.

22) I love my job! I might not like some parts of it but the job itself is great and I have one or 2 little mates there which makes me happy.

23) I lived on my own for 3 years before moving in with my Dad. Then moved in with my Mum- because she's awesome and cooks really nice food :)

24) I mimic accents all the time- not realising I am doing it- which doesn't help when you are going to Canada in a few weeks- for nearly a month! I will definitely come back with a twang.

25) I can touch my nose with my tongue. Apparently the first time I pulled tongues as a baby I freaked my Mum out a little bit.

Ok so that's me.....a little bit more of me....I'm weird, I know

And if you've read this- you have to do it too! Either in a blog- or on Facebook on a note. Come on- join in- I'm a nosey mare and want to read more of these!!!

Normal service will resume in the next blog!

Much Love,
Tanya x

New Changes, Getting a Grip and Plugging Away

Hi everyone- apologies for being so quiet lately- life has been really hectic and I've not had much time online.

Last week was a bit of a disaster eating wise. I booked a "holiday" at group because I knew it was going to be a disaster and I was away at the weekend....so a gain was imminent.

So because I told myself I wasn't getting weighed for 2 weeks I had a "black hole" Tuesday. Ate what I wanted....

Then I went to work on Wednesday and a colleague brought me a piece of home made mega-syns cheesecake- which was gorgeous! So I thought "oh well- blown it today- might as well enjoy myself and get back on it Thursday"- something I NEVER did before I got to target and still losing!

Thursday....well, I just didn't have the focus in me so I just kept eating- and eating and eating........

Then it was Blackpool! Well- anyone who has been to Blackpool will know that there aren't many eateries where there are low-syn meals! A group of us went to a lovely restaurant which specialised in fish and chips.....and cake- lots of cake!!

The hotel I was staying at had brekkie included in the price- the only thing syn free were the tinned tomatoes- even the bacon you couldn't get the fat off because of how streaky it was! So I enjoyed myself! Over did it- definitely but I enjoyed myself.

I did buy a couple of punnets of strawberries and took rocky roads with me so it could have been worse! (That's what I'm telling myself!)

Anyway I got back and I still couldn't draw a line under it! I could not stop eating no matter how much I told myself to stop!

So I knew the inevitable- I was going to get weighed on Tuesday. I found a fiver and I got myself to group. Don't get me wrong I was going to go anyway- but I wasn't going to get weighed. I was just going to see the lovely members and have a natter but I knew that the accountability was necessary to start again.

I put 6lb on.....

Which, all things considered, that was a pretty decent result!

I had a good natter with Julie last week in regards to going back to my old target. It seems that, even though I wanted to lose more, I'm not half bad where I was with my 10st 1lb weight loss. My BMI was healthy (still is) and I was doing ok at maintaining.

So I asked Julie if it was possible to go back to my old target- she found out for me and it is possible- but I have to get to my exact target weight (12st 6) not just in the target range....

The 6lb gain takes me to 12 8.5lb so I have 2.5lb to lose to get to target. That way I can stop stressing, stop getting angry and frustrated with myself and just take it easy. I really have been stressing too much.

I'm going to Canada in 4 weeks (This time in 4 weeks I should be in the air!) and I want to get back into the art of maintaining for a little while before I go.

So that's the plan. I would love to lose the 2.5lb this week so we shall see where I am on Tuesday!

I've well and truly got a grip. I got a lot of motivation off Julie and the members of the groups I was at. That's why I go to group- to keep grounded and to get the support I need! And to support others if I can.

Oh- there is an "Ops" evening (when you get information about being a Slimming World consultant) on 12th April. Julie said if she doesn't have a team meeting or anything else on she'll take me which is awesome! I think it will be great to get all the info I need. I have been before but we got there late (I went with another member) so it will be good to go so I can have a read over and put plans in place so I am stable enough financially to apply! It's so exciting!

Anyway I am off to bed- I've been on plan today- 7 syns in total- when life is a bit less hectic I will get back to the food diaries etc on here- promise.

My alarm is going off at 2.30am as my shift starts at 4am! Need my sleep!

Ni night you lot!

Much Love,

Tanya x

https://www.facebook.com/FatFlutterby

Oh Here We Go Again!

This just feels like a repeat of a few weeks ago- only I'm not at Caz's computer weeping my heart out feeling like the whole world has kicked me in my non-existent nads!

I was doing so well this week- apart from "Sod It Tuesday". I had planned meals- had low syns, ate less fruit and more veggies, changed my Healthy Extras around....

Then came today....

Usually I am one of those people that sees the weekend as a normal day- nothing special. I work in retail- we don't really *do* weekends. But I have been off all week- I've been pretty inactive (because I've been resting my bad knee which is still mad sore!) and just all-round been a lazy flutterby.

Anyway- today was my step-sister's 18th birthday. With birthdays come cake- 2 cakes in fact (now 3- I notice there is a giant cupcake on the table here) Initially I was being really good and turning down a piece....then I had a bit of icing.....

Then I had a piece- ok 2 (teeny pieces) then I had a taste of the homemade chocolate cake.....ok a small piece....which started me off......I then had an easter egg and one of those caramel eggs....

Then I went to a meeting and had half a dozen jammy dodger thingies and some cookies.....

Then I went to my mate's house and had quavers and custard (don't ask!) and houmous with carrot sticks and cucumber (see? some healthy stuff!) then followed by a packet (a whole one) of jaffa cakes....

Then I went home and had some rice krispies.....and a cheese buttie....and some toast....with butter....and then a big bowl of rice krispies WITH sugar!

WHEN IS THIS GOING TO STOP!!!!

I don't want to know about the syns- I really don't....it's SCARY!!

Over the space of the evening I was getting guilt, then "sod it, don't care", then guilt, then "it's ok, I'll accept the result on Tuesday", then "I'm not getting weighed"....

I have been arguing with myself (in my head- I'm not THAT crazy!!) trying to get myself to stop- of course, I couldn't.

I have 1 week left of my countdown and I really wanted to be at target then and it looks like I'm going to be about half a stone heavier than when I started it 6 weeks ago! It's sickening. 

There is something just not quite right in my head now- the want has gone. It's like I'm starting to accept my size- great, fantastic....but I still want to sabotage everything! Look, I know that I've lost 10 stone, just over- woohoo- bully for me. For some people I know that's mega inspirational, I get that- I sought inspiration like that- people who had lost lots.

What I didn't realise is this stuff doesn't get easier! Sorry guys- I don't want you to think that once you lose the weight it will be all hunky dory and you will never need to worry about it ever again (I'm not insinuating that you think like that- but that's what I thought, genuinely!)

The hard work is in the maintaining- because you don't have anything to aim for- no awards, no stickers, no attention.....just a "well done, you're still at target, how are you for this week ahead?" in Image Therapy....

Anyway- I think I've had my fill.....I just wish I didn't have to go through this every couple of months. I just want to be able to eat like a "normal person". (Which isn't dissimilar when I hear alcoholics say that when they first got help with their drinking they wanted to be able to drink like normal people)

In fact I've just answered my own dilemma there. An alcoholic can't, and never will be able to, drink like a "normal person". I'm a food addict- therefore I very much doubt that I can eat, and think about food in the same way as a normal person....whoever this normal person is!!

Acceptance. My life tends to revolve around it- or it should do. We all have to accept a lot of things.

I accept that I'm 5'11, that I'm going to be called "Tan" by people who like to see me twitch. I accept that my brother is always going to jump out of dark spaces and scare me at every opportunity. I accept that I really am not the kind of person that suits wearing glasses......

But there are things that I struggle to accept- powerlessness over food being one. Other peoples' actions and thoughts being another. 

In fact those 2 things, if I could sort those things out and learn to accept them then I don't think I'd be half as miserable!

I cannot eat normally. When I'm eating- I'm wondering "is this enough?" and when I'm not eating- I'm constantly thinking about it. What can I snack on? What's for dinner? I know from experience that it's an obsession and an addiction- there's nothing much I can do about it, other than work on it! Do what people suggest.....some days I am good at it, I do these things that are suggested and I have a good, slightly less obsessive day.

Then there are days like today. Where I just stick anything in my mouth (don't be rude!) and feel the remorse later.

The other thing I struggle to accept- people. That's a big one with me at the moment because my head can be sent off big time with this.

I am one of those people that doesn't think so much of the people who care and who are positive- but focuses on the people who don't like me, who go out of their way to make little digs, or deliberately ignore me.....

Why? Because I hate being disliked!

Don't get me wrong- I am a marmite kinda girl- love me or hate me. I am gobby, sarcastic, I put my foot in it, I can be bitchy.....But I'm really sensitive. I am caring and I hate being disliked- and I hate disliking others....I have something called "stinking thinking" where I do take one little resentment and run with it- nurture it, feed it until it's a big fat resentment! I have done it a few times and there are still one or 2 that really get to me.

It is affecting my weight loss sometimes. Not so much the weight loss but going to group or posting in certain facebook groups. I have had little digs made at me, or had some posts blatantly ignored. Sometimes I'm asking for help and I don't get it....

I lie- I do get it- but not off the people I know have an issue with me. So the people that do comment, even though I am grateful- that goes on the backburner while I focus on thinking about why someone else hasn't commented or offered support....

There you go! Stinking thinking!

I know I need to focus on the light and the positives. I know people care and love me- those are the people I should spend my energy and time on... Sounds easy doesn't it? 

Maybe that's a mid-week resolution for me then- something to work on!

Anyway- I've had my fill of crappy food, back on plan from now. There is no way I'll get a loss but at least I can work on getting some of this extra food weight off!

I just needed to get this off my chest. I've always been told that there is no point bottling things up- that's how things get worse. Just share the crap and move on. 

I've shared the crap- now I'm moving on!

New day tomorrow- and there are going to be some positive changes made!

If you're struggling too- reach out- don't bottle it all up- don't isolate (I don't just mean with food here- with anything that is affecting your positivity) find someone you can trust- get it out. Then give yourself a way to turn the negative into a positive and go for it! Just because we feel bad now doesn't mean we will forever!

Thanks for sticking with me- I'm not perfect but I try my best- and god loves a trier (apparently!)

Much Love,
Tanya x

Don't forget to like my Fat Flutterby facebook page!

Picky Things and Re-reading My Book!

Hi you lot, me again!

I've had a case of the hungry monster today.....mainly because I couldn't really go out due to my sore knee (still!!) So I decided- rather than snack on fruit all day- I wanted a change.

I decided to make a syn free houmous to nom with carrot sticks, peppers and cucumber. It was really quick and easy- no piccy but here's the recipe:

**Syn Free Houmous**

Tin of chickpeas in water
splash of lemon juice
garlic
paprika
cajun spices
frylight

1) Blend the chickpeas with a bit of the water from the can with a hand blender until smooth
2) mix in the lemon juice, garlic, paprika and spices to taste. If you want to put more in then feel free to! I made mine with quite a bit of garlic.
3) leave to cool in the fridge for a bit- it tastes nicer cold

That's it- takes 2 minutes and is very tasty! Great if you are hosting a party and need nibbly bits.

Funnily enough I spent the evening with my friend Sami who is also doing Slimming World (newish member). We went to Asda for some nibbles and she bought a reduced fat sour cream and onion dip. It's about 1 syn a level tablespoon and I looked at the ingredients and thought "I can do better" so I'm going to make it my mission to make a low syn dip!

I taught her about a low syn chocolate dip though- for fruit dippy things- she couldn't believe it when she tried it- I guess the recipe is going to have to be written out too eh?

**Chocolate mousse/yoghurty pud**

1 tub fat free fromage frais
2 sachets of cadbury fudge highlights (2 syns a sachet- 4 syns for both)
a couple tablespoons sweetener

Just mix them altogether and serve with yummy fruit! Which we did. It was really yummy and felt like one of these "naughty treats". We split it between 3 of us so rounded it to 1 1/2 syns per portion that we had!

It was nice to have some munchies while with friends and not go over my syn allowance- there's no need to feel deprived!!

Anyway- what I also did today was I decided to try a different Healthy B option. Just for a laugh. Rather than just bread or rocky roads. So I got my book out (if you haven't for a while I recommend you do it too) and looked at the HUGE list of Healthy Extra options- it's not all bread and cereal you know!

Did you know that if on Extra Easy you can have some dried/canned/cooked fruit as a HEB? or some soups? Get your pack out and have a little read- a change may just do you good!

So my HEB today? Rhubarb! Frozen chunks cooked in a teeeeeeeeny bit of water and a few tablespoons of sweetener. 450g is a HEB and it was gorgeous! Will definitely be having it again! Even if I just have it as syns- at 1/2 syn per 100g cooked- it's not exactly breaking the bank!!

My food diary for today!

Breakfast- 2 skinny lizzies (2 syns), 2 bacon, 2 eggs, just over 1/2 tin beans, cherry tomatoes. Greek style muller for afters (1/2)
Lunch- houmous, 1 oatbran (1 syn) carrot sticks, sliced pepper and tomatoes (light lunch as was having dinner earlier)
Dinner- 4x Quorn sticky fillets, packet of low fat Supernoodles, lettuce, tomatoes, pepper, beetroot and pickles. 250g cooked rhubarb with weight watchers dessert yog
Snacks- houmous and cucumber, chocolate yoghurty pud with pineapple, grapes, apple and some banana (1 1/2 syns for the pud), weight watchers dessert yog.

Syns- 5
HEA- milk (300ml 1% milk)
HEB- 450g cooked rhubarb

Feeling positive this week- not letting the result of last week get me down!

Tomorrow is a busy day- going out in the evening with friends- so need to get my beauty sleep!

Ni night you lot
Much Love,
Tanya x

Don't forget to "like" my fat flutterby page on facebook!!

Don't Try This at Home!

Hi everyone- sorry I've been so quiet lately- my head's been a bit squewed.

I was so chuffed with myself for being on plan 100%. Milk measured, well within my syns and lots of superfree.

I stood on the scales and had my first ever undeserved gain- 1 1/2lb.

Devastated didn't even cut it. I'm now in my old target range and paying for the privilege. I was hoping to have my 11 stone by the end of the current countdown- which ends next week.

I barely took notice in image therapy because I was so upset- I nearly started crying because I just felt like I wasn't believed when I said I had been on plan! But everything I ate I wrote down! People who know me know that I'm a stickler for the plan- checking things before eating them and always logging them!

Anyway- I said openly in group that I was going to have an "eff it" night- ironically tonight was the night we were talking about the "black hole" of after weigh in- where we eat certain things and don't count them. They all add up and people don't realise how many syns they're eating and not counting....

I always say that we start a new week as soon as we step off the scales. It doesn't matter if we do it ourselves but that's what the scale's take on the situation is! 

For the last 2 weeks I have not gone over my syns once- even "treat tuesday" (which, may I add, I NEVER did until I got to target) cost me something like 14 syns the first week and 12 1/2 syns last week.

But I was so gutted- I just thought- sod it- I want to eat what I want and enjoy it. I hobbled to Asda (since my knee hurts still) and bought practically the whole shop...I started eating but didn't get round to finishing it all because I think my eyes are bigger than my belly. So I have a small pizza in the freezer, a packet of jaffa cakes and a creme egg in storage and I was bloated as hell when I went to bed last night!

Do I feel better? No, not really. But I started my week again as soon as I woke up.

A friend of mine who used to be a consultant checked out last week's diary and she saw nothing wrong with it- but suggested it might be about portion sizes. Funnily enough, the twin (Caz) said the same thing- and about snacking on fruit.

I mean- free is free right? Eat until you're satisfied then stop. The thing is, I don't "do" satisfied. I don't have an off switch. I can be bloated for a few minutes but then a glass of juice and I'm ready to go for another round!

So I'm being mindful about what I eat this week- that's my little change for this week. I'm going to see what next Tuesday brings and then decide on the next course of action! I might not get a great loss because of what I ate last night- but we shall see eh?

So- food diary for this week (minus the blackhole of tuesday)

Breakfast- muller light yoghurt
Lunch- 3 bacon, 2 egg (fried in frylight), tin of beans on toast (2 small slices, HEB)
Dinner- a chickpea curry (will post recipe up soon- promise) with lettuce, tomatoes, radish and pickles.
Supper- leftover curry with beetroot, pickles and tomatoes.
Snacks- apple, weetabix oaty bar (3 1/2), greek style muller (1/2), 40g reduced fat cheddar (HEA), small amount of left over tuna pasta (1/2 syn for the mayo)

Syns- 5 1/2 (synning 1 syn for a dash of milk in my coffee at starbucks)
HEA- reduced fat cheddar
HEB- bread.

Tomorrow- nothing food-wise planned but might crack open the scan bran for a laugh!

Not giving up- I want to be able to wear my target badge again- with my NEW target!

Now- to bed for me- busy day tomorrow

Much Love,
Tanya x

Quick Fixes and Why They Are Bogus!

Hi everyone- tis me again!

I feel compelled to write about something tonight that I have found to become more of an issue of late. Don't get me wrong it's been going on for an age- hell, I did it when I was desperate- but it's something that worries me so this is why I thought the need to talk about it.

I'm talking about resorting to the "Quick Fix" method.

It's not just with weight loss here it can be about anything and everything- but using weight loss as an example here.

The last few days I have been on a forum I regularly post on and I have seen several threads about wanting to use 2 weight loss plans in one go. So Slimming World with something else- Weight Watchers, a diet where you starve for 2 days a week, slim fast, etcetc.

People asking if it would be ok to do this- to basically use 2 weight loss plans at any one time to get a better weight loss.

When I was at my biggest, I was desperate to lose weight- and simple calorie counting wasn't cutting it- because I would practically starve myself and once I was hungry that was it. It was the same thing when I did the soup diets, shake diets and "sit in a dark room and hope you never have to eat again" diets. They didn't work! Sure I could lose practically a stone in a week but the week after when I started eating again- I put double back on again!

I couldn't grasp the concept of losing weight steadily to be the size I wanted to be. The thought of being a size 12 was such an appealing concept that I wanted to be a size 12 there and then- yesterday if possible! The only way I could have done that was if I say on a bacon slicer or had liposuction! Not practical to say the least.

So this desperation lead to desperate measures- and like I said, I did try everything that would possibly give big losses quickly. If it said I could lose 2 stone in a month then I tried it. I never got that far though and I always ended up bigger, always.

When I found out about Slimming World- the fact that you could eat food and still lose weight- without obsessing about calories, without the need to have a drink instead of a meal I was definitely willing to try it. Especially when someone I was close to was doing it and doing well.

One thing I needed to do was accept that I didn't get fat overnight. It wasn't a sudden thing that I went to bed a size 8 and woke up a size 28. It was YEARS of abuse- food, alcohol, fizzy drinks- it got me to the size I was. 

Because it took a while to put it on I had to accept that it was going to take a little while to be where I want to be. That was hard. Because that childish voice in my head was still going "but I want it NOW!" But I joined, I followed the plan and I have actually had some big losses. But like I said on Tuesday, I have had some smaller losses too- 1/2lb, 1lb. They might not be huge in the grand scheme of things but every half pound or pound- they have all added up to nearly 150. 

I don't know how long I expected it to take- I think I began to adopt the mindset of "I will get there when I get there" rather than worrying about time frames and deadlines.

People lose weight for different reasons. Some do have time constraints- a holiday or a wedding. The thing is- if you do resort to fast fixes- sure you will lose the weight- but did you want to keep it off? Because you have to work at that too. It's not just "congratulations- you are now a size 12- eat what you like because now you're here it's impossible to put any weight on ever!".

I'm not poo-pooing the meal replacement diets- or weight watchers. I know that different diets and weight loss plans work for others. Slimming World doesn't work for everyone for whatever reason! But what you have to do is work at losing weight and then work on maintaining that weight loss. A lot of people forget about the second bit.

I know of a few what I would call "quick fix" diets have a maintenance plan that you can follow to "ease" yourself into eating food again and can help you get back to eating like a normal person- but I struggle to see how it helps with the most important thing- the issue you had with food in the first place.

I was, and am, a food addict. If a cake is there I ate it- now I just obsessively think about eating it and have some strawberries instead. Slimming World has taught me how to curb this addiction. It's not gone, but it's lessened. I can work on bakery in work and not have to buy 4 baguettes afterwards to scoff on the way home! I am dealing with the reason why I put the weight on in the first place. 

It's not just about losing weight- it's about tackling those demons too! 

I am glad that it took me as long as it did to lose the weight- which really wasn't slow! It gave me time to adjust, to get used to eating "normally" rather than having takeaways 3 times a day every day. As well as giving me time to adjust to being a smaller size. 

It's a journey- not a race. I don't compare my weight losses to others because they don't have my body- we all lose at different speeds- we all have things going on in our lives and we all have things that could affect our weight losses on any given week. So I gave up comparing and focused on my weight loss journey. After all- that is the most important one to me because it's mine!

There are people who have lost a lot more than me- my best friend for example has lost nearly 20 stone. I don't compare to her because I didn't have that to lose in the first place! If I lost 20 stone I would be a little bit dead right now!

So Flutterby's little tips here:

Pick a weight loss plan that suits you- not 2 or 3 at the same time- ONE! Try it for at least a month- 3 would be better. Give it your all. If you want to fanny about then you're not going to get the loss you want- if you do that you can't blame the weight loss plan you're on. If you are not ready to lose weight- if you don't want to or you don't feel like you can commit- then don't. Why waste your money? However I have heard of people who go to the likes of Slimming World just to maintain- even if they aren't where they want to be- I do encourage that- if you think that will help you maintain. That in itself is part of a journey- so use it to your advantage.

Set yourself little goals. Especially if you have a lot to lose like I did. In the beginning 10 stone was what I wanted to lose- I was determined. But after a few weeks I started to focus on every 1/2 stone- bitesized chunks helped stop it be so daunting!

Quick fixes don't work. They help in the short term but life is pretty long sometimes- be kind to yourself and your body- look at maintenance too- not just about the fixing!

It might be a long road guys, but I promise you every step forward, every good choice and good decision you make it will take you closer to your end goal. If you gain- that's ok! As they say "there's no shame in a gain" just don't give up! You haven't failed if you gain- you fail if you give up and stop! So don't fail- don't give up- you ARE worth the time and effort- and it is so worth it- I promise!

Now- enough of me lecturing- quick food diary!

Breakfast- rocky road (3) pineapple, grapes and strawberries with snackpot yog
Break- beans, tomatoes, apple, 2 satsumas, kiwi
Lunch- 3 skinny lizzies (3) 3 bacon, 2 eggs, 2 large mushrooms stuffed with reduced fat cheddar (HEA) and onion, beans and 2 slices wholemeal (HEB). Greek style yog (1/2) for pud
Dinner- chicken, boiled spuds, SW roasties, carrots, peas, green beans and syn free gravy. Pineapple, strawberries and grapes with muller light for pud
Snacks- 2 meringe shells (1 1/2), 2 satsumas, apple, pear.

Syns- 8 1/2 (extra 1/2 syn for dash of milk in coffee in the morning)
HEA- reduced fat cheddar (40g)
HEB- 2 small slices wholemeal bread

Tomorrow is my last shift in work and then a whole week off! And I'm starting my week off with a trip to see my fabulous Twin- for lunch, dinner and a sleep over! Can't wait- much needed twinny time- lots of coffee and a catch up! Then of course it's weigh in Tuesday- I will keep you posted of course!

Now it is time for bed- I'm tired and I just noticed it's nearly 1am!! Thank goodness I'm not in until 7am!

Much Love,
Tanya x

P.S. Don't forget to "like" my Fat Flutterby Page on Facebook! <---at nearly 250 likes now- omg!!

Normal Bog-Standard Day (usual food diary here!)

Hi everyone, the weekend is here- which means nothing to me because I was working today and I'm working tomorrow! Haha.

Shift went quick today- even though it was 7 3/4 hours!!! It's extra pennies in next month's pay packet!

Only 2 more shifts (tomorrow and Monday) and I get a whole week off! 

Nothing out of the ordinary today- so I shan't ramble, for once! I will however share a picture of my lunch with you!

That is my speed soup with my HEB of ryvita and 1/2 HEA of philly light cheese (most was on the ryvita but I always stir in a small spoon of it (weighed out of course!!) into the soup when it's heating through just to give it a bit more of a creamy texture! Now though I remember how tasty ryvita is and just want to keep eating it- uh oh! But I stuck with my 4 within my allowance and didn't scoff the whole pack- go me! Very nice, very healthy lunch!

Oh-mum asked me to get some fruit in as we were running low.....so I got a few bits in.......

Well that should last us a few days!! (note the radishes at the bottom- I haven't had radishes in an age so thought I'd get some to see if I still liked them- turns out I do! yum!)

Anyway- on to the food diary!

Breakfast- rocky road (3) activia snackpot
Break- beans and tomatoes, apple, banana, 2 satsumas
Lunch- speed soup, 4 ryvita (HEB) and 37.5g philly light (1/2 HEA) greek style muller for pud (1/2)
Dinner- left over spag bol with pasta, salad, and radish. Jelly for pud (1)
Snacks- tub fromage frais and sweetener, wafer thin ham, pineapple, rocky road (3)

Syns- 7 1/2
HEA- 1/2 philly light, 1/2 1% milk 
HEB- 4x ryvita

I am about to log off and chop up some fruit for tomorrow's munchies- planning on taking some to work with me as the lady in the canteen on Sundays is a little stingy with the portion sizes, and I don't want to be hungry!!

I can't believe how quick this week has gone again- weigh in is just around the corner and I have those nerves creeping in already! It will be what it is- but I of course am hopeful!!

Now- to prep! Always great to be prepared!

Much Love,
Tanya x

P.S. please like my Fat Flutterby Facebook Page for mini updates and stuff!

New Day (Thank Goodness For That!)

Hi everyone just a quickie again- work in the morning and need my sleep! It's going to be a busy day!

Today is much much better than yesterday- which I knew was possible anyway! A decent sleep helped with upping my mood that's for sure.

I had a lovely lunch with Chris and later in the afternoon I headed over to see my granddad. It's not that far to his, about half an hour on the train. I actually got off the train one stop earlier for a bit of body magic- because that is how I roll!

I enjoyed my time with Granddad- he hasn't been well- a case of the flu- but he's getting better by the looks of it!

I walked back to the station and got the train most of the way home (Mum and Arty picked me up which was mighty nice of them!)

Then it was dinner time- I was rather hungry- cooked myself a lovely spag bol- nice and simple and really quick. Recipe? Oh ok then:

1 1/2lb extra lean mince
2 oxo spag bol cubes (don't ask me where you can buy them- my consultant gave me them a few weeks ago so have no clue)
1 carton passata
1 large onion
1 red pepper
1 green pepper
half a dozen cherry tomatoes
garlic and mixed herbs (to taste)

1) brown off mince, drain any excess fatty bits
2) chop the onion, peppers and tomatoes and add to the mince.
3) crumble in the oxo cubes and mix well, fry for 2 minutes
4) add the passata with the teeniest bit of water just to make more sauce
5) mix in some garlic and mixed herbs (maybe about a teaspoon of each- depending on how you like it)
6) leave to simmer for about 10 minutes on a low heat just to cook through

I had mine with pasta and salad- syn free and quick and easy!!!

Food for today:

Breakfast- berries, yoghurt and rocky road 
Lunch-chicken sizzler (3) with jacket spud, grilled tomato and side salad
Dinner- syn free spag bol with pasta and salad. banoffee yog for pud (1/2)
Snacks- 2 hard boiled eggs, punnet strawberries, rocky road, galaxy hot choc (3)

HEA- milk in tea/coffee/hot choc
HEB- rocky road x2
syns- 6 1/2

Still on track! So still hopeful for Tuesday- half way there!!

Right, off to bed now- busy day (going to get my speed soup out of the freezer for a quick lunch tomorrow!

Much Love,
Tanya x

P.S. If you haven't already- check out my Fat Flutterby Page on Facebook!

Being Social and practicing opposites

Hiya- just a quickie for me, it's past 3am and just got on here! Daft eh? Good thing I'm not in work tomorrow! 

I have been put in for overtime at work- I thought I had 2 shifts until my week off- it's now 3- I'm in on Saturday. But it's money at the end of the day!

I made plans to meet up with a friend who I haven't seen in forever. We went for lunch at the Hungry Horse (my usual haunt it seems!) It was a great few hours- chatted lots and had a great catch up!

Being the social flutterby, I went out tonight too with friends. I was feeling in a bit of a funk, if I'm being honest and I didn't want to go- but I was once told to "practice opposites" as in if I didn't want to do something and it was good for me- go do it! I'm glad I went, it was a good evening.

The night finished with helping a friend in need- just someone who needed a friendy ear and shoulder and I had both to spare! To be honest my head hasn't been screwed on right at all today- I had a panic attack on the way to work (not the worst ever but it shook me up a bit) and it just carried on all day with things happening.

Basically- me picking up stuff that I shouldn't pick up. Other peoples' opinions of me for example. I know I shouldn't pick it up, I should just leave it but it's hard when you're a chronic people pleaser such as myself. I hate conflict so when there's conflict, I panic- stick my head in the sand.

Anyway- practicing opposites- I want to hide and I'm not going to....no matter how appealing and easy it seems....

Back to food- always about the food. 

I've been on plan again today- not actually eaten as much as I usually do- go me!

Breakfast- rocky road and banana
Break- beans and tomatoes, apple, 2 satsumas
Lunch- chicken sizzler skewers with jacket spud and side salad (I count 3 syns for the piri piri sauce as according to the guy I paid- nothing is actually cooked in oil- and nothing was oily!) punnet strawberries for pudding
Dinner- 2x skinny lizzies (2 syns) 2x rosemary saussies, mash (with spring onion, chives, garlic and a bit of cajun spice- and a spoon of quark to make it creamy) with mushy peas and salad.
Snacks- yoghurt, punnet grapes, 2 slices melon, rocky road

Total syns- 5
HEA- milk
HEB- rocky roads

So....pretty good- maybe not enough- knowing me- and only 1 yog? what's that all about??

Tomorrow- day off work. I'm having lunch with a friend and if I can find the gel seat for my bike, a cycle down to see my Granddad- as he's not well at the moment so want to go see him. Body Magic is a bonus!

Can you tell I'm totally serious about this weight loss thing? Definitely want a better loss than last week!

Oh and not had a sneaky look at those scales- have no clue what I weigh- it's hard when you're an obsessive weigher! But I needed to kick it into touch that's for sure!

Right- bedtime.
Goodnight!

Much Love,
Tanya x

Hunger Monster Day (and body magic!)

Hi! Happy Wednesday!

Seriously I have been a proper food monster today! I've just been constantly hungry- no clue what that is all about!! I seem to have eaten enough food to last a normal person about 2 days! But after a really amazing dinner I'm feeling satisfied, finally. I'm actually nearly ready for my pit!

It's terrible though- when you're like that, isn't it? Just wanting to eat and eat and eat- not feeling satisfied. I fear every time that I will go for the likes of bread- stodge that will bloat you something silly! I used to do that- eat pizzas, chippy chips, chocolate, heavy cake, burgers......and I would be so bloated it was unreal!!

When I have a day like today I make sure there are lots of speed foods to grab! Like today I had baked beans as a snack (super speedy!) and melon (also super speedy!) I try to avoid snacking on things like big bowls of pasta, or wholemeal bread etc- because I will just want more and I will feel icky after a point!

Speed and superspeed foods, even when eating lots, are not so bad. I know that pasta, rice and spuds are all free- but they are heavy and I find them easy to overeat. That's why- when the hungry monster arrives- then the superfree or speedy food comes out!

I am still hopeful for a loss- I just hope that my appetite lessens just a little bit! (I'm sure mum is hoping too since she buys the shopping in!!)

I have had a busy day today- I was in work at 6am and that kept me distracted for a few hours. I then had to go to the doctors to sign some forms and stuff. 

I had a quick bite to eat then I walked 2 1/2 miles to have lunch with my friend Maz, since she left her pack and rocky roads at group- I said I'd get them to her! We had a lovely lunch and I walked back! My little leggies are a little tired!

On the way home I called my twin (Caz) to see about going over to see her next week. She's doing amazing as a consultant and I think we're due a catch up. Also- the Asda in Southport has an Opticians and I need an eyetest and most of all new glasses.......so I'm doing that too! This flutterby needs new specs to help with her new look!!

So....reasonably productive day-I love it! 

Nothing else much new if I'm honest- except that I'm starting to get giddy as I'm going to Canada in **seven** weeks! That's getting to be quite soon!

Okies- on to the food!

Breakfast- yoghurt

Break- tomatoes and beans (I might just start calling it the usual!) with banana, 2 satsumas, apple and 2x rocky road (HEB)

Lunch- ham jacket potato with salad (no dressings, fat removed from ham) followed by rocky road (3 syns)

Dinner- Salmon fillets with egg fried rice and salad. banoffee yog for pud (1/2)

Snacks- tin baked beans, greek yog (1/2 syn), berries with sweetened quark, melon (nearly a whole melon, omg!) Going to have 2 meringue shells before bed (1 1/2 syns) to get me over the 5.

So see what I mean? Hunger monster, couldn't stop nomming

Total syns- 5 1/2

HEA- milk (in tea and left overs were made into strawberry "milkshake")

HEB- rocky roads

Okies- hopefully the hungry will pass tomorrow- I don't want to overeat! 

It's nearly time for bed I think- going to have a relaxing bath and get some sleep. My alarm is going off at 3.30 for work!

Only one more shift then I get 2 days off. Then it's 2 days in and a whole week off! Can't wait!

Much Love,
Tanya x

P.S. don't forget to "like" my facebook page! <-----click on link

Disappointment and Putting Things Into Perspective

Hi everyone! A late one tonight- only just eaten and settled down after checking facebook.

Today's weigh in....well....I wasn't extremely elated, let's put it that way. My scales were telling me that I was on the way to putting 1lb on! I was devastated- and I took it as gospel.

Rule number 1- don't weigh on different scales- and definitely don't take them seriously- they lie!

I stepped on the big black box and...

Lost 1/2lb.

I would be telling porkies if I said I was happy with that loss. No- I was gutted initially. 53 syns all week. No "eff it" Tuesday. Extra body magic. Measuring everything that needed to be measured.

For. Half. A. Pound.

Anyway- 5 minutes later I was sitting in my seat by the little Slimming World shop and I was fully accepting of the loss. Do you know why? Because it's a loss! I'm lighter now than I was this time last week. 

Most importantly- in 6 1/2 weeks it will mark 2 years since I started on this weight loss journey and right now I am sitting here 10 stone 5lb lighter. 

That odd half a pound or a pound, doesn't sound like much sometimes, in the whole scheme of things- but they all add up! If it wasn't for that half a pound, I wouldn't have lost what I have lost!

So why am I disappointed? I'm not! After the initial dummy-spitting I remembered the most thing which is this:

2 years ago I would never have thought a picture like this would be taken. Wearing a sash and holding a certificate (and pretty flowers!) to celebrate being the Greatest Loser in my group with nearly a 10 1/2 stone weight loss.

Don't get me wrong- I was hopeful when I joined- but I never thought I could do it. 10 stone was a lot of weight to lose- and god knows I had tried so many times and failed.

There are so many things I can do now that I couldn't do when I was 23 stone. Like getting up the stairs without collapsing in a heap at the top. Going for walks, even crossing my legs and painting my toenails! 

Those little losses add up to BIG losses. As long as we keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep on plan we will win the battle of the bulge and get to our target! That's all that matters!

My plan of action this week- because I am hoping for a better loss this week:

1) I am going to be 100%
That's a given- measure everything that needs to be measured, eat my superfree, have my minimum of 5 syns a day and no more than 15. 
2) I'm going to do more body magic.
I'm going to try and blow the dust off the Wii Fit. I'm also going to try and find my dad's gel seat for the bike and get on it! Even walking- I've got my comfy shoes!
3) I'm not going to get on the scales!
I'm a prolific scale hopper. I do suffer with mild OCD when it comes to things and I am addicted to getting on the scales.......so no scales this week- nope- not at all- just you watch!
4) I am going to take it easy.
I'm not going to stress constantly about losing on Tuesday- or try not to at least! Just take each day as it comes and enjoy it! That's it....
5) I'm going to keep a food diary
Yes- again! Just to keep up with what I'm eating- it keeps me focused and on track. Also you guys can see it and can tell me off if I missed something- if I counted something as free if it isn't......

5 steps to success right there! Well, that's what I'm going to do and hope that it pays dividends next week!!

I'm elated to be the Conservative HQ's Tuesday 5pm Greatest Loser. I'm a proud member of my group and I love going every week. I've got a lovely consultant who has the patience of a saint and has supported me and helped me get to where I am now. The members are amazing (not just at 5pm but I regularly visit the 1pm group and do the shop at the 7pm group) and every single person who has lost even 1lb since joining I am inspired by- it's the truth!

It doesn't matter how much weight you have to lose- if it's 10lb, 10 stone or more. Your journey is yours. That weight that you're carrying- you want it gone. You don't want it. It might be for any number of reason- but you want to lose it and you're working towards getting to target and hoping to enjoy maintaining your weight loss!

I'm not lucky to have lost the weight I have- which I do hear sometimes. Luck has nothing to do with it- hard work, perseverance and patience- that's what's got me here! Luck is waking up one morning and suddenly being a size 10....alas it didn't work like that.

What I am lucky for, however, is to be given a second chance at life. At 22, I was ready for the knackers yard. I thought that was it- my life was well and truly over. I was on heavy medication for depression, I was miserable, full of anxiety and fear and my physical health was just dire....

At 24 I am on reduced medication (hoping to be off them by the end of this year!) I have only had a small handful of panic attacks which is amazing progress and I am not limited due to my weight. Most of all- I like myself. I don't hate what I see in the mirror. I have some pride in myself and I am happy. When I have a smile on my face it means I'm happy- it doesn't mean that I am pretending to be happy to please others and to hide a whole list of issues going in my head.

It's awesome- my life is awesome.

Right- enough of being philosophical and stuff- let's get down to food.

Breakfast- rocky road, apple, banoffee yog (1/2 syn), tea w/25ml 1% milk (1/2 syn)
Lunch- (didn't have any- naughty! was too nervous about weigh in- need to stop doing that!!)
Dinner- bowl syn free chilli, large punnet strawberries, yoghurt, tub mini meringues (10 1/2 syns for the whole tub)
Supper- rest of the chilli, 40g cheese, boiled rice and salad. jelly (1 syn) yog and grapes for pudding 

Syns- 12 1/2 
HEA- measured cheese
HEB- rocky road x2

Tomorrow I'm in work so will have fruit ready to munch on. I'm going for lunch with a friend but she's on Slimming World too so it'll be a low-syn lunch!

Right! Alarm is going off in 4 1/2 hours! Time for bed.

Ni night you lot!

Much Love,
Tanya x

P.S don't forget to check out and "like" my facebook page! <-- click for link!

Body Magic and Final Food Diary of the Week!

Hiya- just a quickie because my bath is running and I want to get an early night- I'm so tired!

I had a lovely day- myself, Kate and my friend from work, Louise, went for a nice walk along the prom to New Brighton- bought some yoghurts (as you do) and some Skinny Lizzie sausages as my rations were running a bit low. Then we power walked back with our haul!

I'm nervous about tomorrow- I always am when I've been good all week!!!

No matter what the result- I have been on plan 100% and for that I am mega proud of myself! I have laughed in the face of temptation and I have overcome my demons (for this week!)

and no matter what the result- as soon as I step off the big black box at 5pm tomorrow, my new fab week begins!! I hope for more of the same!

My food diary for today:

I opted for a Green day again- it just kinda happened like that!

breakfast- melon and yoghurt
break- 2 apples, satsuma, beans and tomatoes, weetabix oaty bar (3 1/2 syns)
lunch- tinned spaghetti, 2x dry-fried egg and cheese on toast (HEA and HEB), jelly, berries and yog for pudding (1 syn for jelly)
dinner- Followed by 4 Quorn sticky fillets, packet of low fat supernoodles and salad. berries and yog (1/2 syn-banana/toffee flavour) for pudding!
snacks- rocky road bar (1/2 HEB) bowl speed soup with 2 ryvita and 1/2 HEA of philly light cheese. 

syns- 5 
HEA- reduced fat cheddar (40g) 
37g philly light and 150ml of 1% milk (exactly half of each)

HEB- 60g wholemeal bread
2 ryvita and 1 rocky road (exactly half of each)

On green days you get 2 of each healthy extra (it's actually 1 or 2 HEA's and 2 HEBs) so I opted for 2 of each!

Total syns for this week I've worked out at 53!

So I'm really hopeful for a loss this week! I'll let you guys know of course!

Keep your fingers crossed please....

Now- I must go- I don't want my bath overrunning!!

Ni night
Much Love,

Tanya x

All Hail the Roast Dinnah!

Hi guys!

Tonight's blog post is brought to you by Heather Small (proud). I don't usually post links but this song is amazing! If you need a pick me up- listen to this song- listen to the lyrics!!

Sometimes I listen to this when I feel down and deflated. It makes me remember how far I've come with EVERYTHING- not just my weight loss!

Anyway- today I want to dedicate my blog mostly to what is one of the most traditional British meals- the Roast dinner! 

I love my roasts- beef or chicken, today it was beef. People think that you can't have a roast dinner and lose weight- I'm here to tell you that you totally can!!!

So what is usually in a roast dinner? let's look at it shall we? (This is an extra easy perspective- some of these things are not free if you're on Green or Original days- check your book or with your consultant if you are unsure!)

Well- firstly we have the meat. Beef, lamb or chicken. We just stick to the basic rules of meat- cut all the fatty bits off and don't add any oil/butter. Roast it "naked"- a bit of water to stop it from sticking. 

Veggies- broccoli, carrots, swede/turnip, sprouts, cabbage, peas, green beans....the list goes on! Most vegetables are superfree (check your Food Optimising book for the full list!) and make your plate so colourful!

Mashed potato- ok well potatoes are syn free aren't they? As my best mate says "a potato is a potato, it's what you do with it that makes it syns". Adding butter, mayo, cream, milk that's where the syns are! So how do we make a syn free mash? Simple! just boil the spuds- mash them and add either a little bit of quark soft cheese, or beat an egg in it. Or, if you want to use minimal syns (which I don't personally but your syns are there to be enjoyed) Hellmann's Lighter than Light mayo is only 1/2 syn per level tablespoon! 

Roasties- another nono, right? WRONG! There is such thing as a syn free roast potato- I'm not kidding!
Simply boil your spuds for 10 minutes or so. Then stick on a tray- spray with frylight and bung in the oven until brown! 

Stuffing- if you want the ready made stuff it will set you back about 4 syns per 50g. That's too many syns and not enough stuffing for me personally!! So I have found a syn-free alternative.Granted it's not the perfect stuffing but it goes really well on my plate- Linda McCartney Rosemary and Red Onion sausages! Totally syn free and they are lovely. just stick one in the oven and have a try as a stuffing replacement!

Gravy- according to the app it works out at about 1 1/2 syns per 100ml gravy (Using Bisto Best as an example). I would probably have about 2 1/2 syns worth- maybe more! But I want a syn free version! Of course I have one! This is how I make my syn free gravy:

dry fry a chopped onion, add hot water (enough for however many you're making it for). If it's for 2 people then add 2-3 crushed beef oxo cubes in and a dash of Worcestershire sauce. Stir well and simmer for a few minutes to let it thicken. Alternatively you can do it in the microwave (I've been told).

Yorkshire Pud- ok no syn free version here but there are some that are smaller- and lower syns. I had an Asda Smartprice one- 2 syns.....BLOODY TINY!!! I looked at it in disappointment- nearly didn't eat it in protest! But I did nom it and it was tasty....I just don't think I will bother personally- but if you want to feel included and think a Yorkie will complete your meal- there are some that range between 2-4 syns depending on the size and brand.

So my roast dinner tonight was beef with boiled spuds (couldn't be bothered mashing) a couple of roasties, 2 sausages, broccoli, peas, green beans, carrot and swede-with a yorkshire pud and gravy- the whole meal? 2 syns!

I saved room for pudding- which consisted of grapes, berries and melon with a muller yog!





I was suitably stuffed to say the least! But it's great that I can have proper, filling meals that feel a little "naughty".

When I tried losing weight before Slimming World, I was lead to believe that things like carbs were bad- no potatoes, no pasta, no rice or pulses....even  meat should be limited. Basically if you live off carrot sticks and celery (gag!) then you'll get skinny!

IT'S LIES!!! Look at what I can eat- and I am here 10 1/2 stone lighter than I was less than 2 years ago! So get eating- fill up on those free foods and superfree!

I do love the Slimming World plan- especially Extra Easy!

Anyway- this is my diary for the whole day:

Breakfast- yoghurt and rocky road (3 syns)
Break- beans and tomatoes, 2x apple, 2x satsuma, pear
Lunch- left over dregs of the pasta from last night (there wasn't much left!) 
followed by 2x skinny lizzies (2 syns), 2 rosemary and red onion sausages, 2 eggs, 3 bacon on toast  (60g wholemeal- HEB).yoghurt for pudding
Dinner- big roast (2 syns for yorkshire pud) followed by grapes, berries, melon and yog
Snacks- fromage frais, melon

Total syns- 7
HEA- milk in tea
HEB- wholemeal bread

Only 1 more full day until weigh day- nervous? Of course I am!! But I have been 100% on plan so I should get a good result!

Now- early night for me- work in the morning and going to have a little walk with my friend Kate- last minute body magic session!

Much Love,
Tanya x

P.S don't forget to check out my Fat Flutterby Facebook Page!! (nearly at 200 "likes"- amazing!!)

Get Some Cooking Confidence!

Hi everyone- Happy Saturday!

I had a very early start this morning with work- but that was another 6 hours of pay I'll be getting next month- I have so much money to save up for- mum's wedding, driving lessons, eventually getting my own little flat....so every bit helps right now! Especially since it's 7 1/2 weeks until my little trip to Canada!

I was meant to be going out to see friends in the afternoon but I was so exhausted- I just had my lunch and slept for a few hours. So this afternoon/evening has been a bit of a lazy one. But I plan on making up for it tomorrow.

Part of the reason why I didn't do extra walking this evening was I had a long power-walk yesterday and my little legs are suffering today! So I thought a rest would help repair the muscles. I don't want to do any major damage!

Anyway today I want to share a bit about cooking....something we all have to do since we've thrown the takeaway menus and frozen ready meals away (for the most part)

When I was at my biggest, I had some basic culnery skills- I could cook pasta until it stuck and I could make toast- that was just about it. I used to be crash hot at cooking but I did practically forget how to do it. I had low confidence in every aspect of my life- cookery was no different!

So when I started Slimming World, I started cooking- with the help and guidance of my mum and a few recipe books that I bought. I even found making soups hard- just because I wasn't used to it.

As time went on- I found that cooking wasn't really that hard. 

You know I was 23 when I first boiled an egg? Sounds silly doesn't it? But it's true! I just never learned, felt no need to learn it. One day- I wanted boiled eggs- I remember messaging my friend Kate asking her how to do it....once I did it a couple of times- I realised how darned simple it was! 

The hardest thing about cooking is definitely lack of confidence. If we don't know how to do something then we read a recipe line by line and follow it to the letter. If it doesn't turn out exactly the way it looks on the professionally done, probably photoshopped picture, then we get disappointed- even if it does taste nice!

Now I'm used to cooking I have the "that'll do" attitude.

You know what that is, right? When you look at a certain herb or ingredient, look at the pan and think "that'll do" and just stick it in. Sometimes it'll work, sometimes it will be a complete disaster- it happens, even the best cooks mess up sometimes!

So I make things like pastas, soups, bakes. I don't give it a second thought. I did in the beginning- but in time my self confidence grew and I didn't get paranoid about how it looked. I managed to gain an understanding of different herby things and I know what will go with what- and what won't go!

So- get your pots and pans out guys! Whether you are a crash hot cook or a complete novice- get in that kitchen and get cooking!

One thing I recommend to anyone trying to lose weight- batch cook! Be it soups, chillis, stews, casseroles.....if you make a few extra portions you can freeze for another time. If you are busy one day then you can just stick something out of the freezer and heat it up. It's like a ready meal but you know there is no chemicals or stray animals in there!

Trust me on this- cooking is awesome- there is a whole big wide world out there food wise- I'm on a weight loss plan that requires me to eat more than a limp lettuce leaf and a cup of green tea a day! So I will ENJOY my food- trust me- I am!!

Talking of food- today's food diary!

My food today inspired this blog post- because my lunch and dinner were both "that'll do" meals. I'll go more in depth next time!

Breakfast- Rocky road bar (3syns), yoghurt
Break- beans and tomatoes, banana, satsuma
Lunch- smoked salmon trimmings with onion, rice, quark and herby things- with salad. pineapple, grapes and banana/toffee yog (1/2 syn) for pud
Dinner- chicken and bacon pasta (with onion, mushroom, pepper, quark and more herby things) with tomato and little gem lettuce. pineapple, grapes and fromage frais for pud.
Snacks- rocky roadx2 , weetabix oaty bar (3 1/2syns) pineapple.

HEA- milk
HEB- 2x rocky road
Syns- 7 

Happy with my food today- definitely becoming more confident in the kitchen! I'm a bit more prepared for tomorrow- fruit at the ready for break time at work- going to cut up some melon before bed for munchies tomorrow. Left over pasta for a light lunch....not sure about dinner- will consult the mother before I decide- I might make something myself or for all of us- we shall see!

Anyway- 3 more sleeps until weigh in! Not that I'm excited or anything!

One of those sleeps is coming soon- work in the morning!

Much Love,
Tanya x

P.S check out my Facebook Page!

Nice Day off (and Friday's Food Diary)

Hi everyone! 

The weekend is here! Which means nothing to people who work in retail! I'm working all weekend- doing overtime tomorrow, but it's money at the end of the day- more money for Canada! 

I had a lovely day off today- I met up with my friend Shena, who I haven't seen in forever. We went for lunch at the hungry horse and then we headed over to Liverpool to see an exhibition. She dropped me off outside the tunnel and I power walked home.

I feel like my eating has been really good still- eating more superfree- and I am moving around more than I did last week. I find that when I am on plan and I'm doing more body magic, it's a bit like a snowball effect- I get more energy, I feel more positive and I want to do more!

I really hope this feeling lasts- I would love to be at target by the end of this 6 week Slim for Good promotion!

Anyway- just a quicky tonight- so  let's talk about noms. I'll make some new things soon and get some recipes out here- so you can all try them too!

Breakfast- rocky road, yoghurt, 2 satsumas
Lunch- piri piri chicken sizzler, jacket potato, tomato, salad (3 syns for sauce)
Dinner- breakfast quiche (1) , savoury rice, salad. yoghurt
Snacks- satsuma, berries and yoghurt, rocky road, pineapple and fromage frais.

I only had 4 syns all day so treated myself to a galaxy hot choc (3 syns- i had an extra spoonful  for an extra syn) 

total syns today- 7
HEB- rocky roads
HEA- milk

Still in control, still focused and really hopeful that I get the loss I deserve on Tuesday! 3 more days on plan before then though- so just need to keep plodding along!

Now- time for bed- it's late and I'm in work in the morning (overtime means extra body magic-can only be a good thing!!)

Much Love,
Tanya x

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