Still Alive (and speed soup)

Hello! I've been very busy the last few days so only just managed to sit down and do a post. I'm still alive, still plodding along!

I have to say- this being at target and staying on plan thing is proving to be very difficult! I know that logically I should be sticking to plan but it's like a kid in the candy shop ignoring all rational advice and just running around stuffing sugary and fattening food in my gob!


The thing is, when I eat rubbish, I feel sluggish, not to mention the guilt that tends to come with it. I have become a touch more lazy- mainly because I have been very tired. Oh but why? Partly down to the bad nutrition, no doubt about that!


I know that I don't want to get fat again. I think I need to accept that inside I'm always going to be fat- I'm still going to want to eat rubbish and that will cause me to gain weight. It's not even comfort eating- I have no reason for that- I actually feel good. It's just that I seem to just keep eating and eating


It's scary, because when I listen to Caz, she has said all this and even though I empathised a bit- I didn't realise until right now (as I'm typing) that most, if not ALL of the stuff she talks about is me too! Crap! It's weird when I hear someone talk about themselves and I realise that they're talking about me too!


I think I need to give myself a telling off- because I have worked really hard to get to target, there is no way I want to wreck it in one week with some bad food.


Come on, Tanya- get a grip! You need to get back on that horse and keep at it! Change that "stinking thinking" to something a bit more positive.


I like this new life I've got- I want to keep it, thank you very much! It's only me that can lose it- no one can take it away from me.


Ahh- that's better! I think I needed to get that one out!


I do feel positive- I think I just didn't know what to do with myself- it was like a weight was lifted off me (pardon the pun) and wanted to try and push my luck- but I can't do that. All I need to do is accept it....watch this space!


Anyway- people were asking for recipe for speed soup, the one I made last week (I need to make another batch actually)


I made it in 2 pans, just because the big huge pan I usually use is in the shed- and I was making it at 1am- there was no way I was going in the shed for the spidies to eat me! So this is how I did it


2 tins tomatoes
1 tin baked beans (branston of course!)
1 tin mixed beans
5 carrots
1 swede
2 onions
1 leek
red and green pepper
few handfuls broccoli 
1pint chicken stock
1 pint beef stock
mixed herbs, pepper, garlic granules (to taste)


1) dice veggies into bitesized chunks
2) split the ingredients into 2 pans. add the stock (chicken in one pan, beef in the other)
3) add a bit more water if needed, to cover everything
4) cover and leave to simmer until everything is soft (about 20 mins to half an hour usually)
5) leave to cool a bit then blitz thoroughly with hand blender


That's it! It's as simple as that! You can add other veggies if you like! I also usually add some lentils or pearl barley but I couldn't find our stash. If you are adding lentils- just boil in a seperate pan for 10 minutes or so then add to the soup mix. It makes it a bit more filling- but really, I didn't think it was necessary in this case.


Because I am on extra easy, I just added a couple of pieces of chicken to the top to make it even nicer.


Speed soup is meant to be great for speeding up weight loss- mainly because what you are eating is speed, or superspeed soup, which is great for a weight loss boost! It's always been good for me!


Remember though- this recipe has beans in- which means that it's not free on red days, if you are doing red days- only free on EE or green (or just EE if you add meat to it!)


But try it- I think it's lovely! Quite cheap too and does make a lot


And you can freeze it!


Ok it's time for bed for this one- I am in work tomorrow, Monday and Thursday (overtime!) I only had 1 shift last week at Asda and I kinda missed the place. I do like my job ( people give me weird looks when I say that!) and the money isn't bad either! I have a holiday to pay for (in September) and my trip to Canada next year too! The more work I do, the more spending money I have, so that means more day trips out- see I have this sorted!


Ni night, hoping that tomorrow is a positive day- for me AND for you!


Much Love,
Tanya x